So, it's 1:38am, and after hours and days and (what feels like) weeks of work I have a treatment that I'm actually kind of happy with. It's not perfect, far from, but it's actually starting to look like something that could become a script. I still have to condense it for class tomorrow, but I thought that I'd at least post the full treatment so that... well... so that I can feel like the work wasn't wasted.
I know, I know. No time spent writing is wasted, but I'm just bummed that I'm going to have to turn in a much shorter version (well, as short as I can make it) that will likely be far more confusing than the treatment I have now.
Being concise has never been my strong suit.
But anyway, without further ado, my treatment!
Project Title: Parasite
Genre: Monster in the House
Date: May 1, 2008
ACT I
1. Opening Image (1): Shot of a country neighborhood as the lights inside the houses get shut off one by one. As the last house goes dark, an expensive four-wheeler barrels through the quiet street.
2. Theme Stated (5): A group of recent high-school graduates hike up to a mountaintop to party and watch a meteor shower. A particularly bright meteor streaks across the sky, and then there is a flash of light. GIRLFRIEND: “Danny, don’t drink so much, you’re going to get sick!” DANNY, one of the partiers who now is incredibly drunk, begins to vomit blood, and then looks up at the others. His eyes have changed. He growls. The kids panic. GIRLFRIEND, runs terrified through the woods. After a brief but terrifying chase sequence, she trips, and with the most awkward tangling of limbs she falls, knocking herself unconscious.
3. Set-up (1-10):
- DRIFTER, a man in his late 20s who appears older, stands along the side of the road. His head is shaved, he has scruffy facial hair and some piercings. His clothing is dirty and vaguely reminiscent of the lone cowboy. After taking a piss he lights up a joint, and begins to hitchhike. A cop car passes by him, and after a pause, returns in his direction.
- DRIFTER sits in the back of a squad car while ROOKIE COP drives him to the county jail. After ROOKIE COP gives up on his attempt to converse with the reticent DRIFTER, reports of a protest can be heard on the police scanner.
- As ROOKIE COP drives down through town, the camera pulls away from the car to focus on the townsfolk. In one long sequence we follow key characters as we pass through town. With each introduction we see the quaint surface from a distance, and then pull in to closer shots to reveal the corruption. MADAM MAYOR and her confidant, B&B QUEEN, power-walk along the street. In a store window BRIDE tries on her wedding dress. GOTH GIRL walks down the street with her headphones blaring reading a book, and MAXINE struggles to carry overfilled shopping bags. GIRLFRIEND, now infected, stumbles home after a night of unconsciousness. Suddenly LOVERBOY rushes past, running to the protest.
- At a gathering to protest the construction of a mall on forested land, LOVERBOY tries to win back his ex-girlfriend, SADIE ACKERMAN. After being harassed several times by an attractive MALE PROTESTER who seems interested in SADIE, LOVERBOY loses it when his shoulder is grabbed. He turns around and tries to punch the offender, expecting to find MALE PROTESTER but instead finds himself face-to-face with ROOKIE COP.
4. Catalyst (12): While DRIFTER and LOVERBOY sit in a jail cell, GIRLFRIEND shows up at the police station looking for her boyfriend, ROOKIE COP. GIRLFRIEND attempts to seduce him, and after a half-hearted protest that he is on the clock, the two retire to a supply closet. After receiving a call about a public disturbance, ROOKIE COP leaves the horny GIRLFRIEND at the station. While he is gone, she initiates sex with QUIET COP, and while they are engaged she enters her feeding faze, and kills him by biting him on the neck. GIRLFRIEND, now behaving in an animalistic fashion, uses QUIET COPS keys and enters the jail cell. DRIFTER instinctively knows something is wrong, but LOVERBOY doesn’t want to admit it. DRIFTER takes on GIRLFRIEND while LOVERBOY attempts to hide. ROOKIE COP returns to the station to find DRIFTER delivering what would normally be a death blow to GIRLFRIEND. As she falls to the ground, ROOKIE COP pulls his gun on DRIFTER and threatens to kill him, but when GIRLFRIEND jumps up to attack ROOKIE COP, he freezes. DRIFTER saves ROOKIE COP, and in doing so cuts off GIRLFRIEND’s head. As her head rolls on the floor, a pupae aliens slithers out of her spinal column.
5. Debate (12-25): After GIRLFRIEND’s death, ROOKIE COP goes into a rage and attempts strangle DRIFTER. While attempting to subdue ROOKIE COP, DRIFTER knocks him unconscious. DRIFTER decides that as he is no longer imprisoned, he will leave. LOVERBOY convinces him to drop ROOKIE COP off at MAXINE’s so that he can “sleep it off” like he has many nights before. Before they leave, DRIFTER attempts to kill the larvae alien, but only succeeds in splitting it in two. As LOVERBOY collects one alien in a jar to study, the other escapes.
6. Break into Two (25): After deciding to take ROOKIE COP to MAXINE’s, DRIFTER searches for weapons while LOVERBOY looks for the keys to the squad car. Although the DRIFTER is now equipped, LOVERBOY was unable to located the keys. After a brief discussion about what to do, we cut to DRIFTER and LOVERBOY pushing ROOKIE COP to MAXINE’s in a shopping cart.
ACT II
7. B Story (30): MAXINE sits in the garage of her father’s house working on a motorcycle. With the sound of a slamming door, MAXINE hurriedly cleans off her hands and enters the kitchen to greet her drunk HUSBAND. After arguing MAXINE goes to care for her FATHER and her HUSBAND watches TV. Just then there is a knock at the door. It is DRIFTER and LOVERBOY with an unconscious ROOKIE COP.
8. Fun and Games (30-55):
- As LOVERBOY tells MAXINE’S HUSBAND and MAXINE that ROOKIE COP just needs to sleep off his drunk, ROOKIE COP wakes up and points the finger at DRIFTER. ROOKIE COP and MAXINE’S HUSBAND tie up DRIFTER.
- As LOVERBOY tries to convince the group to let DRIFTER go, an INFECTED NEIGHBOR and his WIFE begin banging on a glass door. ROOKIE COP empties his barrel into them, breaking the door and allowing them entry. Before they are attacked, however, MAXINE’S FATHER enters the room and shoots them with an old rifle, then collapses.
- The group discusses what to do next, and decides to track down the movements of GIRLFRIEND, who had been seen acting oddly before anyone else. They enlist DRIFTER’s help in exchange for letting him go free.
- The group heads to GIRLFRIEND’s house, with MAXINE’S FATHER in a wheelchair with a gun across his lap. They take out several infected townsfolk on the way.
- When they arrive at GIRLFRIEND’s house they find her sister, GOTH GIRL (who is herself infected, but hiding it) being attacked by her infected PARENTS. They rescue her, and she reveals that GIRLFRIEND had gone to a party on the mountaintop the night before. The team decides to investigate, and GOTH GIRL joins them.
- The team heads into the woods, where they must pass through “redneck territory.” Here they encounter the elderly paranoid METH COOK. He, MAXINE’S FATHER and DRIFTER get along well, but everyone else seems nervous. METH COOK arms them with some explosive materials, and points them in the direction of the crash site. MAXINE’S FATHER stays with METH COOK and gives his rifle to MAXINE.
9. Midpoint (55): The team arrives at the crash site. With the explosives that METH COOK gave them they destroy the ship, but as they do so a piercing summons is transmitted.
10. Bad Guys Close In (55-75): As the ship burns, several INFECTED HILLBILLIES and some of the PARTYING TEENAGERS surround the team. In the resulting skirmish, ROOKIE COP gets killed and MAXINE’S HUSBAND gets infected. The team splits up in an attempt to avoid the INFECTED HILLBILLIES, and while in hiding MAXINE’S HUSBAND attempts to rape GOTH GIRL. However, before he can complete his attack, MAXINE shoots him in the head with her father’s rifle. As the team reconverges, they find themselves once again surrounded. However, before the fight can begin, the INFECTED leave en masse as if directed by some signal.
11. All Is Lost (75): As the team rests in the forest during their apparent respite, GOTH GIRL wanders off. DRIFTER follows her, having noticed the signs that she is infected. He approaches her, and in a conversation that reveals a complete transformation of her attitude, she admits that although she had previously been obsessed with death, she is afraid of dying, but that she does not want to “go out like the rest of them.” DRIFTER offers a brief but insightful comment on death, and then snaps her neck.
12. Dark Night of the Soul (75-85): While DRIFTER and GOTH GIRL are gone, LOVERBOY finally gets a hold of SADIE (having been attempting to call her the whole film). She tells him that something is wrong with her father, BUSINESSMAN, and MADAME MAYOR and that she and some others have been taken to the construction site. After DRIFTER returns to alone, DRIFTER announces his intention to leave. LOVERBOY attempts to convince him to stay, telling him what SADIE had revealed. DRIFTER comments that the world isn’t worth saving, to which LOVERBOY says “she is.” DRIFTER then leaves in search of transport with the intention of leaving town.
13. Break into Three (85): DRIFTER returns to MAXINE’s house with the intention of stealing MAXINE’S HUSBANDS car. Instead, he finds the motorcycle that MAXINE has lovingly restored, and he realizes that she has her dreams to live for. DRIFTER returns to the group riding the motorcycle.
ACT III
14. Finale (85-110): The team heads to the construction site, where they discover a new, larger hive surrounded by INFECTED. DRIFTER and MAXINE take down MADAM MAYOR and BUSINESSMAN, while LOVERBOY rescues SADIE and the HOSTAGES. The uninfected fight and kill the remaining infected and then return to the town.
15. Final Image (110): After saying goodbye to the few surviving townsfolk, MAXINE and DRIFTER ride off on their motorcycles to Los Angeles to wipe out the aliens altogether.
So, it's not perfect, in fact, it needs a lot of work, but it's there! Huzzah! That's all I have to say to that.
Now on to the scene...
I know, I know. No time spent writing is wasted, but I'm just bummed that I'm going to have to turn in a much shorter version (well, as short as I can make it) that will likely be far more confusing than the treatment I have now.
Being concise has never been my strong suit.
But anyway, without further ado, my treatment!
Project Title: Parasite
Genre: Monster in the House
Date: May 1, 2008
ACT I
1. Opening Image (1): Shot of a country neighborhood as the lights inside the houses get shut off one by one. As the last house goes dark, an expensive four-wheeler barrels through the quiet street.
2. Theme Stated (5): A group of recent high-school graduates hike up to a mountaintop to party and watch a meteor shower. A particularly bright meteor streaks across the sky, and then there is a flash of light. GIRLFRIEND: “Danny, don’t drink so much, you’re going to get sick!” DANNY, one of the partiers who now is incredibly drunk, begins to vomit blood, and then looks up at the others. His eyes have changed. He growls. The kids panic. GIRLFRIEND, runs terrified through the woods. After a brief but terrifying chase sequence, she trips, and with the most awkward tangling of limbs she falls, knocking herself unconscious.
3. Set-up (1-10):
- DRIFTER, a man in his late 20s who appears older, stands along the side of the road. His head is shaved, he has scruffy facial hair and some piercings. His clothing is dirty and vaguely reminiscent of the lone cowboy. After taking a piss he lights up a joint, and begins to hitchhike. A cop car passes by him, and after a pause, returns in his direction.
- DRIFTER sits in the back of a squad car while ROOKIE COP drives him to the county jail. After ROOKIE COP gives up on his attempt to converse with the reticent DRIFTER, reports of a protest can be heard on the police scanner.
- As ROOKIE COP drives down through town, the camera pulls away from the car to focus on the townsfolk. In one long sequence we follow key characters as we pass through town. With each introduction we see the quaint surface from a distance, and then pull in to closer shots to reveal the corruption. MADAM MAYOR and her confidant, B&B QUEEN, power-walk along the street. In a store window BRIDE tries on her wedding dress. GOTH GIRL walks down the street with her headphones blaring reading a book, and MAXINE struggles to carry overfilled shopping bags. GIRLFRIEND, now infected, stumbles home after a night of unconsciousness. Suddenly LOVERBOY rushes past, running to the protest.
- At a gathering to protest the construction of a mall on forested land, LOVERBOY tries to win back his ex-girlfriend, SADIE ACKERMAN. After being harassed several times by an attractive MALE PROTESTER who seems interested in SADIE, LOVERBOY loses it when his shoulder is grabbed. He turns around and tries to punch the offender, expecting to find MALE PROTESTER but instead finds himself face-to-face with ROOKIE COP.
4. Catalyst (12): While DRIFTER and LOVERBOY sit in a jail cell, GIRLFRIEND shows up at the police station looking for her boyfriend, ROOKIE COP. GIRLFRIEND attempts to seduce him, and after a half-hearted protest that he is on the clock, the two retire to a supply closet. After receiving a call about a public disturbance, ROOKIE COP leaves the horny GIRLFRIEND at the station. While he is gone, she initiates sex with QUIET COP, and while they are engaged she enters her feeding faze, and kills him by biting him on the neck. GIRLFRIEND, now behaving in an animalistic fashion, uses QUIET COPS keys and enters the jail cell. DRIFTER instinctively knows something is wrong, but LOVERBOY doesn’t want to admit it. DRIFTER takes on GIRLFRIEND while LOVERBOY attempts to hide. ROOKIE COP returns to the station to find DRIFTER delivering what would normally be a death blow to GIRLFRIEND. As she falls to the ground, ROOKIE COP pulls his gun on DRIFTER and threatens to kill him, but when GIRLFRIEND jumps up to attack ROOKIE COP, he freezes. DRIFTER saves ROOKIE COP, and in doing so cuts off GIRLFRIEND’s head. As her head rolls on the floor, a pupae aliens slithers out of her spinal column.
5. Debate (12-25): After GIRLFRIEND’s death, ROOKIE COP goes into a rage and attempts strangle DRIFTER. While attempting to subdue ROOKIE COP, DRIFTER knocks him unconscious. DRIFTER decides that as he is no longer imprisoned, he will leave. LOVERBOY convinces him to drop ROOKIE COP off at MAXINE’s so that he can “sleep it off” like he has many nights before. Before they leave, DRIFTER attempts to kill the larvae alien, but only succeeds in splitting it in two. As LOVERBOY collects one alien in a jar to study, the other escapes.
6. Break into Two (25): After deciding to take ROOKIE COP to MAXINE’s, DRIFTER searches for weapons while LOVERBOY looks for the keys to the squad car. Although the DRIFTER is now equipped, LOVERBOY was unable to located the keys. After a brief discussion about what to do, we cut to DRIFTER and LOVERBOY pushing ROOKIE COP to MAXINE’s in a shopping cart.
ACT II
7. B Story (30): MAXINE sits in the garage of her father’s house working on a motorcycle. With the sound of a slamming door, MAXINE hurriedly cleans off her hands and enters the kitchen to greet her drunk HUSBAND. After arguing MAXINE goes to care for her FATHER and her HUSBAND watches TV. Just then there is a knock at the door. It is DRIFTER and LOVERBOY with an unconscious ROOKIE COP.
8. Fun and Games (30-55):
- As LOVERBOY tells MAXINE’S HUSBAND and MAXINE that ROOKIE COP just needs to sleep off his drunk, ROOKIE COP wakes up and points the finger at DRIFTER. ROOKIE COP and MAXINE’S HUSBAND tie up DRIFTER.
- As LOVERBOY tries to convince the group to let DRIFTER go, an INFECTED NEIGHBOR and his WIFE begin banging on a glass door. ROOKIE COP empties his barrel into them, breaking the door and allowing them entry. Before they are attacked, however, MAXINE’S FATHER enters the room and shoots them with an old rifle, then collapses.
- The group discusses what to do next, and decides to track down the movements of GIRLFRIEND, who had been seen acting oddly before anyone else. They enlist DRIFTER’s help in exchange for letting him go free.
- The group heads to GIRLFRIEND’s house, with MAXINE’S FATHER in a wheelchair with a gun across his lap. They take out several infected townsfolk on the way.
- When they arrive at GIRLFRIEND’s house they find her sister, GOTH GIRL (who is herself infected, but hiding it) being attacked by her infected PARENTS. They rescue her, and she reveals that GIRLFRIEND had gone to a party on the mountaintop the night before. The team decides to investigate, and GOTH GIRL joins them.
- The team heads into the woods, where they must pass through “redneck territory.” Here they encounter the elderly paranoid METH COOK. He, MAXINE’S FATHER and DRIFTER get along well, but everyone else seems nervous. METH COOK arms them with some explosive materials, and points them in the direction of the crash site. MAXINE’S FATHER stays with METH COOK and gives his rifle to MAXINE.
9. Midpoint (55): The team arrives at the crash site. With the explosives that METH COOK gave them they destroy the ship, but as they do so a piercing summons is transmitted.
10. Bad Guys Close In (55-75): As the ship burns, several INFECTED HILLBILLIES and some of the PARTYING TEENAGERS surround the team. In the resulting skirmish, ROOKIE COP gets killed and MAXINE’S HUSBAND gets infected. The team splits up in an attempt to avoid the INFECTED HILLBILLIES, and while in hiding MAXINE’S HUSBAND attempts to rape GOTH GIRL. However, before he can complete his attack, MAXINE shoots him in the head with her father’s rifle. As the team reconverges, they find themselves once again surrounded. However, before the fight can begin, the INFECTED leave en masse as if directed by some signal.
11. All Is Lost (75): As the team rests in the forest during their apparent respite, GOTH GIRL wanders off. DRIFTER follows her, having noticed the signs that she is infected. He approaches her, and in a conversation that reveals a complete transformation of her attitude, she admits that although she had previously been obsessed with death, she is afraid of dying, but that she does not want to “go out like the rest of them.” DRIFTER offers a brief but insightful comment on death, and then snaps her neck.
12. Dark Night of the Soul (75-85): While DRIFTER and GOTH GIRL are gone, LOVERBOY finally gets a hold of SADIE (having been attempting to call her the whole film). She tells him that something is wrong with her father, BUSINESSMAN, and MADAME MAYOR and that she and some others have been taken to the construction site. After DRIFTER returns to alone, DRIFTER announces his intention to leave. LOVERBOY attempts to convince him to stay, telling him what SADIE had revealed. DRIFTER comments that the world isn’t worth saving, to which LOVERBOY says “she is.” DRIFTER then leaves in search of transport with the intention of leaving town.
13. Break into Three (85): DRIFTER returns to MAXINE’s house with the intention of stealing MAXINE’S HUSBANDS car. Instead, he finds the motorcycle that MAXINE has lovingly restored, and he realizes that she has her dreams to live for. DRIFTER returns to the group riding the motorcycle.
ACT III
14. Finale (85-110): The team heads to the construction site, where they discover a new, larger hive surrounded by INFECTED. DRIFTER and MAXINE take down MADAM MAYOR and BUSINESSMAN, while LOVERBOY rescues SADIE and the HOSTAGES. The uninfected fight and kill the remaining infected and then return to the town.
15. Final Image (110): After saying goodbye to the few surviving townsfolk, MAXINE and DRIFTER ride off on their motorcycles to Los Angeles to wipe out the aliens altogether.
So, it's not perfect, in fact, it needs a lot of work, but it's there! Huzzah! That's all I have to say to that.
Now on to the scene...
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